Ancient, Stretched-Faced Bitch Tells Of Useless Daughter’s Grief Over Dead Junkie.

 

Kelly Osbourne is taking time out of her life of doing absolutely nothing to be all sad and stuff about the untimely death of her alleged friend Amy Winehouse. Such is the level of Kelly’s grief, her miserable harridan of a mother Sharon has been at pains to let the world know of her sorrow. “This was the first person she's loved who she's lost” said Sharon, whose forehead is regularly employed as a landing strip for Harrier Jump Jets. “That in itself made her frightened and shocked. She's gone through all these different emotions.” 


Poor little lamb. The only two emotions that Kelly knows are ‘mouthy drunk’ and ‘the munchies,’ so this must indeed be a confusing time for the worthless little twat.

Continued Sharon, whose chin is routinely deployed in the Antarctic as an icebreaker for the Russian Navy: “The only thing that will help her is time.” Yes Sharon, time. And a fucking shit-load of drugs. Oh wait, Kelly’s off drugs now, right? Sure. And Amy Winehouse is living on an island somewhere with Elvis and that guy from The Manic Street Preachers. Stupid old cow.