Noted talent-vacuum and silicone implant enthusiast Jordan Real Name Katie Price 32 (that's her actual full name if every tabloid in the land is to be believed) has stunned literally nobody by announcing that her sham totally legitimate marriage to goon-faced cage-fighter Alex Reid is on the rocks. The ridiculous bint purportedly told pals that she and Alex were embarking on a two week trial separation to "take stock" of their relationship and determine exactly "where their lives are going." I could save Jordan and Alex some valuable tan and pap time right here and now by telling them exactly where their lives are going - to the nearest satellite television channel desperate enough to give them another reality show so they can bore us all to death with every sordid detail of their split.
Reid has allegedly moved out of the mansion he shared with Price and fled back to his parents' house in Hampshire to put some distance between himself and the awful woman. Suggestions that he wear a crucifix to keep the bitch permanently at bay have reportedly fallen on deaf ears. Jordan, meanwhile, has behaved exactly as you would expect anyone whose marriage had just fallen apart to behave - by jetting off to Las Vegas and partying the night away like an underage Lindsay Lohan. Apparently, her devastation was most evident as she basked in the boozy attention of a number of (obviously drunk and very probably blind) male admirers.
Expect the usual cycle of shameless press releases and photo-ops followed by straight-faced appeals for privacy. Why can't this vapid bitch just do us all a favour and fuck off to Outer Mongolia or somewhere?
Expect the usual cycle of shameless press releases and photo-ops followed by straight-faced appeals for privacy. Why can't this vapid bitch just do us all a favour and fuck off to Outer Mongolia or somewhere?
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